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Marriage Advice For Newlyweds – Seven Foundational Tips

    Marriage advice for newlyweds like this image shows

    The wedding is over. Now what? That’s where marriage advice for newlyweds can be useful. If you set the correct ground rules for your marriage, you will have a solid foundation on which to build a really great life together. In this blog, we give you tips on how to do that.

    1. Set your newlywed expectations

    Too often people expect their partner to be everything for them. They expect a friend, lover, financial partner, companion and so on – all in the one person.

    Just because you are now married, it doesn’t mean that you no longer need close friends. It is really important to have friends you can confide in. They may be friends of both of you. Or they may just be your friend, but not your partner’s friend. Don’t expect them to automatically click with your friends. They may never click with them. And they may also have their own friends that you never come to love.

    Not all happily married couples say that their partner is their best friend. They don’t have to be. But you do have to live with them, so you need to work out the ground rules for doing that. You have to decide who will do which tasks around the house and which tasks you will do together. If you like the washing up to be put away before going to bed, be honest with your partner about that. Discuss the little mundane things like this.

    2. Learn how to communicate about the little things and the big things too

    You may like to practice communication skills with a counselor to act as a third party. For example, you let each other speak for a certain equal amount of time. You don’t interrupt. And then you repeat back to your partner what you think they just said to you. And then you give them a chance to clarify if it isn’t what they meant to say.

    Learning how to communicate it the bedrock of a great marriage. It can help you to avoid having arguments and to creating bad feelings.

    And if you do fight, you need how to fight fair. No matter how upset you get – you shouldn’t put your partner down. And you shouldn’t threaten divorce. Just acknowledge that you don’t agree over this particular issue.

    If you can’t fight fair, consult with one of our experienced couples counselors.

    3. Allow time for each other

    We all get busy with work and other demands. But if you don’t set aside specific time for each other, what is the point of being married? Set at least a few hours a week that are untouchable “us” time. And try and connect face to face for at least a few minutes each day. Make sure to make it physical – a hug at least or a kiss.

    Try and eat together and set a no “phones at dinner” rule. Look each other in the eye. Talk about your day.

    Some coupes set aside one night a week to have as “date night” (or “date day”). Go out for dinner or a movie or a nature walk or whatever you consider special.

    4. Discuss intimacy

    Expectations can often be crazy when it comes to sex. But having regular sex is essential for keeping a strong bond between you both. Discuss what “regular’ means to you. It may not be every day. There is no “normal”. Every couple has a different routine. And some prefer it to be completely spontaneous.

    Whichever way you decide to go, check in with each other once a month to see if you feel satisfied with the amount and type of intimacy you are having.

    5. Make an effort

    We all get tired with all the demands that are put on us. But sometimes it is good to make an effort for your partner. You may like to dress up, cook a special meal or both.

    6. Don’t blame them

    Rather than blame your partner, take responsibility for your own life and your own happiness. Think about what you can do to improve your own life. Exercise more, eat better, get more sleep, meditate, get counseling and so on.

    7. Keep on seeking out new marriage advice for newlyweds

    The aim of being in a relationship is to grow as a person. How can you be more loving? This blog gives you some ideas, but there are always more ways to develop and grow. So keep learning and practicing and being loving. The more you give, the more you will get back over time.